Dinding

Every now and then a colleague will confess to me that he or she feels powerless at times, and that having to deal with the feeling of helplessness when confronted with a dying patient can only be dealt with through experience. It is not something that can be easily taught in medical school, as it is a rather abstract concept, and each encounter between a doctor and a patient is unique, both in terms of the circumstances as well as the individuals involved.

Having said that, I myself have never felt this way when dealing with a patient. Even when things do not go well, I am assured by the fact that in most circumstances everything that could have been done, was done. And in my mind, there is always the fact that human beings are fallible and eventually, the body fails the mind and we all die. Sometimes it is tragic and unexpected, sometimes it is a prolonged process that everyone wished had happened earlier. The end result is the same though; we live and then we die.

The only time I do feel helpless though is when someone dear to me is faced with a problem with is not easy to solve. On one level, I know that sometimes all that needs to be done is to be there for your friend, and provide a shoulder to cry on or a ear to listen. But on another level, I can’t help but wish that I could jump in and make things better.

And I suppose this begs the question – do I not feel this way about my patients because I do not care enough for them? Or because I have a very effective mechanism of building a wall and ensuring that I do not become too emotionally attached to them, unlike my friends, whom I am very attached to?