Nilai-nilai murni

Sejak kebelakangan ini, media massa (termasuk laman-laman web yang berhubung kait hal politik di Malaysia) dipenuhi berita tentang peraturan baru (isu pemakaian tudung) yang dikenakan ke atas anggota-anggota polis wanita di Malaysia. Menurut IGP Negara kita, tindakan ini adalah sehaluan dengan matlamat dan misi kerajaan dan polis untuk menyelaraskan pasukan keselamatan kita, dan membantu menyalurkan nilai-nilai keIslaman kepada individu-individu terbabit.

Bak kata Mat Salleh, ‘What a load of bollocks’.

And I’m not talking about my attempt at re-conjuring my SPM karangan-writing skills. Look at it this way – why make a big issue about wearing the headscarf when the PDRM is not only not wanting to follow the suggestions by the IPCMC to clean up their act, but is getting the BN MPs to block it in parliament as well? What’s the bloody point in getting everyone to wear a headscarf, if corruption is rampant, people die under custody without a post-mortem being taken place, or if they seem to give Guantanomo Bay a run for its money?

And therein lies the problem - it's more important to appear Islamic than to actually think about one's actions. It's ok to blow yourself up and take a few dozen innocent people with you as long as you shout 'Allah u akbar!'. It's ok to skim a few thousand or million ringgit here and there as long as you can quote a Hadis and wear a kopiah.

And all the fanatics will start shouting ‘Wei…ni hal pakai tudung…jangan masuk campur!’. You get the Minister in the PM's department threatening non-Muslims not to ‘incite’ the sentiments of Muslims, promptly followed by accusing an opposition parliamentarian as being an ‘Islam-hater’ for doing nothing more than echoing the discomfort of many Malaysians over the ‘tudung’ directive for all policewomen. And so the PR bandwagon roles into town, and as usual, ethnicity and religion are used as weapons to cloud the judgement of everyone’s who bothered to tune into this ‘sandiwara’.

Wanna get high?

Day trip to Newcastle was fruitful - got my comics, got random stuff (like shaving cream, don't ask me why I didn't just get it in Carlisle), went into Waterstones and was totally suckered by the '20% off all books' sale, attempted to placate Ct's nerves over a milkshakes, and although I didn't actually buy anything for Sweetie's b'day (the main reason I made the trip), I had come to a decision by weekend's end.

Been around a few interesting characters as well. On the way back to Carlisle, I was joined at my table by a few chavs. An initially awkward atmosphere was a heck of a lot lighter an hour and a half later, where we chatting away and I was taught their 'secret handshake' as a parting gift. However, they were a little miffed when I declined to drink their Newcastle Brown Ale nor to snort the white powder that they had in great abundace.

Feeling rather tired at the moment, although I had the whole of Sunday to rest. Probably down to the fact that I've done 2 on-calls in 4 days, and will be on-call again this weekend. Which means it's still another week and a half before I get my next proper rest. The joys of medicine.

Having said that, I can't believe that it's already 2 months into my gastro rotation. Well, almost 2 months. And the past few days have been fun too, as I unsuccessfully attempted to have a go at pleural aspirations and lumbar punctures (the latter was on a horribly obese guy who had to have the lumbar puncture done by a radiologist under imaging). Looking at the bright side, I'll have an opportunity to have a go at both procedures again tomorrow and hopefully I'll be luckier this time round.

Also having the full team back this week, so ward rounds can be quite interesting to be in 'cause you're not the only one running around doing stuff, and everyone is chipping in. This is probably the only team I know of in which the consultants themselves are happy to write discharge summaries or take bloods or send off forms when they know you're busy. Plus, there'll be a couple of medic students with me so hopefully that'll ease the chores!

Playgrounds

Was kinda tagged by Kudo for the following, which I thought would be a nice exercise in walking down memory lane.


How many schools did I go to?

Hmm…in total, I went to 5 schools (moved from Muar to Kajang to Taiping to Banting). Spent the first couple of years in St Andrew’s Institution in Muar, less than a year in SRK Jalan Bukit (I think) in Kajang before settling for more ‘permanent’ schools. Obviously, formative years were spent in the schools below, although the school in Muar will be best remembered for the ‘belangkas’ that lived in the monsoon drain next to the school that I used to poke at, and I can’t remember much about the Kajang school except that I had a crush on this prefect in pink uniform. Don’t remember her name or face or anything at all, but I’m sure it happened. Or was it a dream? Hmm…

3. SRK King Edward VII, Taiping (3 years)
Motto = Magni Nominis Numbra (In the shadow of a great name)

Probably the most well-known of the schools I’ve studied at. It’s was the first English school in Perak, and one of the oldest in Tanah Melayu. I don’t remember the exact reasons for enrolling in this school that’s more famous for it’s rugby than anything else (methinks), but it was fun trying my hand at the game, along with hockey and other physical activities, none of which I excelled in!

I also loved the actual building site itself, which is the original site for Malaysia’s first railway station. I remember watching little orange owls in their nests, playing with scorpions that lived in the barks of the ancient rain trees that bordered the rugby field. Or just walking around the compound early in the morning (with the excuse of doing my prefectorial duties) whilst the mist was hovering over the wet grass. Brilliant.

Oh, and Sweetie’s dad studied here as well!

4. St George’s Institution, Taiping (5 years)
Motto = Honor Virtutis Praemium (Honour is the reward of virtue)

I moved to this school ‘cause it was supposedly the school that offered the best (academically) in Taiping. And sure enough, I was never top of the class anymore. Haha… the honour usually went to Ee Meng or Pravin, and deservedly so.

More than any other place, this is the academic institution that probably played the biggest role in making me the person I am today. There was probably nothing special about the place itself (although for some reason, a few of the old boys went on to be Archbishops and cabinet ministers in Singapore), but it was probably more the atmosphere and the company I kept with. And those of us who still keep in contact do agree that it was probably a unique point in our lives.

Memories? Too many of them I guess. From debating, to discovering comics, to slacking off, to lepakking at the principal’s office under ‘official’ business, to discussing the advantages/evils of Mahathirism, to singing the tunes of Les Miserables, to organising various social functions and to the grand old tradition of growing thick skins - I guess that’s why I have a soft spot for Taiping, although I agree it can be tremendously boring post-high school!

5. MARA College Banting (15 months)
Motto = No idea. Must be something about ilmu and agama.

Supposedly the college with the best International Baccalaureate results in the world, I entered this place with trepidation. After all, I was one of the only folks who wasn’t from a boarding school and I spoke malay with a funny accent. Oh, and my dad happened to be the guy who had whacked a few of the students who became my coursemates. Joy.

I don’t think I ever did fit in, nor did I like the place very much. Waking up early, having curfews, having to watch how and who you speak to, being told off for wearing shorts (oh, and pyjamas too) – I guess I was a little ‘undisciplined’ for the place. But I was blessed to have a group of friends that I did forge a bond with, and they made the whole experience a little more worthwhile. After all, it’s over here that I got to know Sweetie and meet my best mate.


Was I the studious nerd or the last minute hero?

Don’t think anyone would ever mistake me for being a nerd, although the word ‘geek’ has been applied a few times (ask Sweetie for further elaboration – something to do with me reading comics, talking what seems like nonsense at times, and being a Star Wars fan). Last minute is definitely the way to go. Best example would be how I crammed a year’s worth of Statistics in the final month before my International Baccalaureate finals, and actually found out that I liked the damn subject.


Was I the class ‘taiko’ or the teacher’s pet?

Neither, come to think of it. I’d prefer to sit back and watch and listen (which is something I still do), although I do have a penchant for being involved in various organisations. Wouldn’t consider myself the teacher’s pet, but I got along well with all the teachers. Except for this one substitute teacher who annoyed me (for reasons I don’t remember anymore), and I remember making her life miserable by writing stories and singing songs about her. Hmm…maybe that’s why she left.


What was the biggest rule I broke in school?

Haha… going AWOL to celebrate Valentine’s with my ex-gf, and not only getting caught by the authorities but managing to worry the hell out of my parents. Of course, they were pretty pissed off once they knew I was safe.


3 subjects I enjoyed

History – the lessons themselves were dead boring, but thankfully I did my own reading and realised that there’s a rich source of entertainment in the silly antics of folks in the past.

Piano – not exactly something taught in school, but a part of my schooling years nevertheless. It’s a pity that I never did like playing the piano nor learning the theory behind it until I was in Grade 8 for both (which is also where I learnt time management, since I sat for my PMR during the same year). And by then I had wasted 7 years of moaning and being grumpy when I had to practise between Asar and Maghrib.

English debate – once again, not a real subject, but something I enjoyed doing during the latter half of secondary school. My main talent was at rebuttal, which was a fun thing to do. And which is something that still annoys a lot of people when I try to play the devil’s advocate.


3 teachers that inspired me

Mr Ooi – maths/physics teacher who taught us the principles of probability by gambling with us.

En Ridzwan – my BM teacher who had a lot to say about the establishment, but whose main aim was to make us ask the question ‘Why?’ at all times.

Pn Rosmah – not really an inspiration, but the teacher who had all the students drooling with her tight kebaya. In other words, I can’t think of another teacher off my head to add to the list above.


Hmm...who to tag? Or is it whom to tag? What about all the folks that I've got a link to in my blog? In other words, all you fella who actually read this blog. ;)

Viva la Revolucion!

The weekend was spent recuperating, as per usual. Although funnily enough, I somehow stayed up ‘till 7am on Friday night. Started off with a game of monopoly, ended with Ct, Yus and I falling asleep as the F1 cars were doing what they do best and going around in circles.

In between, we brought down our old pics and the 3 of us had a rather amusing time looking at past pics (along with going through the process of getting rid of some) and laughing at each other’s appearances in the past (I’m guilty of going through phases of being bald, having a moustache and a goatee among others). It was an interesting night, and I’m glad I shared it with the 2 of ‘em.

The whole lot of us (sans Ellina, who was away in Glasgow) caught V for Vendetta on Saturday evening. I must say I enjoyed it tremendously, ‘cause it kept true to Alan Moore’s vision of a post-apocalyptic country that is run fascist dictators. Dictator, actually. The acting was pretty good (especially Hugo Weaving’s portrayal as V – his voice definitely has presence) and there were enough special effects to satisfy the box office audience.

There were variations from the original e.g. the originally was set in a post-nuclear holocaust and certain personal characteristics were tinkered with but on the whole it maintained the essence of the comic book. It was first published in 1982 (and set in 1997) i.e. less than a year after my birth and during the height of the Cold War with an eye on the ramifications of false propaganda, I first read it during the start of the first Gulf War, and even now it’s applicable to the changing stratosphere of global politics. It’s a pity that Alan Moore didn’t play a bigger role in the making of the movie itself, as he’s sworn off getting involved in remakes of his comics. And it’s even more of a pity that he didn’t even get acknowledged as he doesn’t even own the intellectual rights.

Sunday was the laziest of ‘em all – think I only woke up around 1. After which I chatted with Sweetie, read a comic, had an early dinner courtesy of Elly and went back to Cumbria.

Jaja was around for the next couple of days. Wasn’t really able to play the perfect host, but we did go out for dinner and she was able to explore Carlisle whilst I was slaving away at the Infirmary. She probably knows a lot more about the history of Carlisle than I do at this stage, having visited the castle, museum and other hitherto unknown attractions. She had just left, but not before depositing my ‘belatedlest’ of b’day gifts; a tie and a scarf. Of which I’ll have to figure out the appropriate method of utilising it over the next few weeks.

Received a cute little card from Sweetie, which somehow inferred that I’m a monkey, but I didn’t mind ‘cause it was really sweet and unique. Spent a good few minutes fiddling with it and it was a pleasure making sure that I had uncovered all of the hidden messages.

Where's the kuda kepang?

I'm currently feeling rather comfy. Just had a luxuriously long hot shower, a tasty dinner consisting of chicken cooked in my friend's Lloyd Grossman's madras curry sauce, and am currently listening to Wynton Marsalis' beautifully rendered Canon in D for 3 Trumpets and Strings whilst sipping on a mug of cold coffee mixed with a dallop of ice-cream and lots of chocolate flakes that Sheril made for me.

Went to the M'sian Night organised by the M'sian Society of Newcastle Univ last night with Omar, Karin and Priya last night. They came along with expectations of good food and exposure to the rich cultural heritage of Malaysia. Unfortunately, the food was nothing much compared to the yesteryears (Priya only had salad and a few karipap as she's vegetarian) and the night was dominated by a Lord of the Rings sketch and even a 'limbo rock' session (although there were a couple of traditional dances and martial arts performances, along with a fashion show). I can't help but feel that so much potential was wasted, or maybe I'm just growing old. But I was deeply embarrased at times, and it was quite sad that the best time my friends from Carlisle had was when we had a few drinks at the Student Union halfway through the sketch. I felt so bad that I paid for their tickets.

It was nice meeting up with some of the people there, though I only knew a handful. And approximately 5 seconds after I left, my ticket was chosen as the winner of the lucky draw, something that has never happened before. Luckily I left the ticket in the good hands of Elly and Ellina, and I was quite happy to leave the hamper with them to take back to the Brighton Grove house, although I did take a packet of biscuits to munch on the way back to Carlisle.

Turns out that there's a student from Taiping who scored 15A1s and 1A2 in the recent SPM examinations. But the poor girl has not been chosen as the top student in M'sia (it was given to a couple of people with 15A1s) and is not even listed in Perak's top 100, which are filled with students who scored 'all A1s'. Bodoh tak? Whether it's a political decision or just a routine gaffe, I do not know, but she definitely has my sympathies. You work your ass off in a normal, 'SMK' school without the privileges that're routinely showered upon MRSMs and SBPs and you don't even get recognition when you succeed. Hopefully, she'll be given an appropriate scholarship, instead of it going to someone less deserving.

I've always been a little anti-MRSM/SBP despite my dad having worked in one for the whole of his career. We definitely differ in opinions on that matter, and he was sorely disappointed when I didn't take up the offer to go to MCKK and refused to even apply for a place in MRSM. I appreciate the wonderful opportunities that exist for those who do decide to go to such schools - you get the best teachers and equipment (my school had to wait for almost a decade to get its labs updated and money promised to it is still outstanding, last I heard wherelse MCKK was totally refurbished when QE2 visited all those years ago), and you have powerful, well-connected alumnis.

But even at Standard 6, I felt that there was something not quite enticing about being in the company of individuals that're of a relatively similar mindset and are given opportunities based on ethnicity rather than socioeconomic circumstances. If I had gone to MRSM like my dad wanted me to, I'd probably never had the opportunity to play the piano, discuss Nietzsche and get confused over Shakespeare with my friends (funnily enough, I used the MRSM library to get hold of my first plays as there weren't many available in my school and nobody else ever bothered to check them out at MRSM), co-publish magazines that almost got our asses sued, learn the art of 'malufying' oneself in public, learn that racial tensions do exist but can be overcome by bonds of friendship and so on and so forth. In essence, I'd have led a very different life, one that I probably wouldn't have enjoyed as much.

Then again, a few of my nearest and dearest had their education in such schools and have turned out to be amazing individuals who aren't just totally academically-oriented. So there must be something good in there somewhere. If only it was made available to the general public too. And I'd probably be a lot more studious if I had gone to MRSM. Haha..

Had planned to go for the gig in Sheffield initially, but the fact that travel's gonna be crap has put me off. Instead I'll spend the weekend in Newcastle, where I hope to catch V for Vendetta, catch round 2 of F1 and lepak with the others as per usual; and on Monday I'll play host to Jaja.

Paradigm Shift

So much for spending the weekend with books. On-call and post-take on Friday were horribly busy enough for me to want to get away from Carlisle and do something totally non-medicky for the weekend. The lack of medical beds ensured that Dr Burke, Dave O and myself had around 40 odd patients to take care of (Dave and I also had to take care of Dr Mac's patients, which numbered around 15) and getting bleeped every 15 mins wasn't the most pleasant of experiences.

But all's well that ends well. Except for the fact that it hasn't really ended and the work has been dragged into this week. It's rather unfortunate that my SHO ain't around, but at least I've got a good reg and a good consultant who dig in and stay back to help as well. Dave and I were only finished around 1930 on Friday, and thankfully he was kind enough to give me a lift back to Geordieland.

The weekend was beautifully spent doing nothing but relaxing. Ate lotsa chocolates (courtesy of Shanti), drank lots of tom yam (courtesy of Elly), ventured out into the freezing temperatures with Elly n Ellina in order to grab a few pics and to comment about the weather. Even managed to catch a movie with Yus n CT - Syriana. It's a good film, with well-paced action scenes that are reminiscent of Traffic. It's kinda anti-neocon America, and it was almost amusing listening to the sound of silence in the packed cinema when the movie was over. You could always listen to the gears grinding in everyone's head as they tried to make sense of the scenes they've just witnessed - basically, it's a tale of what parts of America would do in order to take control of the oil reserves in the Middle East and the consequences of such actions. George Clooney wasn't too bad in the movie, but I'm not sure why he won Best Supporting Actor for the Oscars though.

Add in the chat with Sweetie, and it was a great weekend.

Of course I'm now back to the news that the Home Office and DOH are changing the rules that're governing the employment of foreign doctors in the UK. This won't affect me until I'm done with my Foundation programme, but it pretty much fucks up what little career plans I had post-Foundation. It's funny that this had to happen during the days that I'm closer to making up my mind about the career pathway that I want for myself.

Now I'll have to broaden my viewpoint and consider a good many factors before I make up my mind again. A friend has graciously offered to marry me in order to help me gain a place, but that only resulted in me laughing for a good 15 mins. Looking at the bright side though, at least I've got a good year or so to make plans, as compared to the poor sods who'll be left in the lurch post July-2006. And heck, it just might be the omen that I was waiting for to help me make decisions. We'll see.

Noots

I’m back to my normal self, after having called in sick last Friday. Wasn’t feeling too well – up half the night with headaches, shivers, sweats – and I was actually contemplating going into the wards in the morning as Dr Mac, one of my consultants, was alone for the day, but he told me not to as I’d inevitably be dragged to do other stuff. So stayed in, relaxed, chatted with Sweetie, forced myself to eat and felt a lot better by Saturday.

Think I just needed a break after a month of hardcore gastro. Especially without an SHO around for the past couple of weeks.

Luckily, I was well enough to take the planned trip to Glasgow on Saturday evening. The trip across the border saw me alternating between devouring the novel I’m currently (and belatedly) reading, Gabriel Marquez’s One Hundred Years of Solitude and having a think about the most random of things (which would occur about every other chapter, when my head’s pounding from reading too much on a moving vehicle).

One of the thoughts that came to mind was the fact that something’s missing in my daily activities. I feel the urge to do something different as a hobby of some sort, something achievable in Carlisle. And the possibilities are many – learning to dance, learning a new language, skiing, riding horses, - but in order to do any of those, I need a car, which I don’t think I wanna get just yet. And I came to the conclusion that I’m kinda missing having something like my piano around, where I can just go and do something completely different from medicine (at the moment it’s limited to reading, surfing the net and watching the telly). Luckily, there’s the possibility that my next accommodation will include a room with a piano in it.

Glasgow was good. Caught up with Em over an Italian dinner, and we proceeded to catch Mirrormask, a movie written by Neil Gaiman and directed by Dave McKean, a chap whose works of art has been a fav of mine ever since I caught sight of issue #70 of The Sandman. Music lovers might know him from the album cover of Counting Crow’s This Desert Life. The movie was very surreal and if you’re not into such things, you probably won’t appreciate the flying fish and the librarian made out of books. It wasn’t as impressive as it could’ve been I think, but things always look so much better in comics. And I think we’re still quite a bit away from a proper Sandman movie.

Sunday involved me receiving my ‘belatedlest’ of b’day gifts from Em n Mq – scale models of the new Batmobile and of Darth Vader’s lightsabre. Typical toys that a boy would love, and heck, I do love ‘em! Mq was pretty happy with her b’day gifts as well, one of which involved us taking a drive thru the outskirts of Glasgow after a bried foray into Forbidden Planet.

The route we chose was a circular one, running from Dumbarton up to Arrochar, before driving back down to Glasgow beside Loch Lomond. Not a tremendously long drive, but a pleasant journey with lots of water and hills to ooh and aah at. Didn’t take any pics myself, primarily ‘cause a couple of hundred were probably taken by the girls as they played with Mq’s new SLR and I figured I’d just nick those off them. Not all 200 of course.

Now I’m back to work with my normal routine. Got back late today, but am quite happy as I managed my first successful paracentesis just before leaving the ward. And I look forward to being on-call tomorrow, as it’ll be a change from the usual ward work. And before I know it it’ll be the weekend, and I’ll be saying hello to the folks in Newcastle again.

Oh, and hooray for Crash and Philip Seymour Hoffman!

Evil eye

Here I am sitting in front of the laptop, attempting to sing along to Pupus, a song by Dewa that was recommended to me by Ellina a few days ago. Reading the news, wondering if Iraq will continue in its downward spiral, wondering the rationale behind raising the price of oil back home in a society that's guilty of excesses elsewhere and marvelling at the mystery of the giant squid (a 9-metre specimen goes on display at London's Natural History Museum today).

Today's the first time since the start of gastro that I was actually able to go home at 5, so I'm been skipping around for the past couple of hours. In my head, at least. The fact that half my ward is empty due to a D&V outbreak probably helped matters a lil, although it's quite a pain to wander around the hospital to check on my patients who're scattered elsewhere.

It's probably a mixture of too much walking around and not eating sufficiently/healthily (for various reasons) that has made a few folks comment that I've been losing weight. Even the nurses on my ward have said that my ass is disappearing. Which is not a good thing, I gather. Didn't really take heed, 'cause folks always say that to me (being thin, that is). Then I decided to weigh myself and was a little shocked to see the figure, so yesterday evening was spent stocking up on the healthiest instant food that I could get my hands on.

Yesterday was also Priya's b'day, and we celebrated in various little ways - dinner, cake, loitering. In that exact order, come to think of it. Of course she managed to run everything by falling down the stairs and accumulating a few abrasions and a sprained foot.

Also convinced her and Karin to go down to Newcastle to catch the M'sian Night performance, which I hope will be well worth the effort. Also planning to catch the gig in Sheffield, but first and foremost there's the day trip to Glasgow this Sunday to wish Mq a happy birthday. Guess I've got a bit of travelling in store, but best of all, I've received my ticket to go home later this year today, and I'm already thinking of stuff to do with Sweetie.