Buku

I’m currently bidding for a book over at eBay that is an item that I’ve been wanting to own for some years now. And to ‘celebrate’ this event, I’ve decided to jot down a short wish list of sci-fi and fantasy books that I’ve been wanting to purchase. Most of ‘em are stuff that I’ve read at some point in my life (and been memorable for various reasons), but there’re a few that has piqued my curiosity.

1. Sandman #19 – Neil Gaiman

As some of you may have guessed, I’m a big fan of the Sandman, having read the entire graphic novel series. In typical ‘kiasu’ mode, I’ve bought a few of the original issues as well, issues that have either struck my fancy or are particularly good. The one thing I don’t have (that I really want) is this particular issue. Issue 19 is a tale of William Shakespeare's A Midsummer's Night's Dream, its original staging for Dream and other mythological figures, including the real fairies featured in the play. The Sandman received additional attention when this won the World Fantasy Award, stunning the audience who were more used to prose works and leading to the rules of the award being rewritten to exclude comic books.

2. Foundation and Earth – Isaac Asimov

The Foundation series takes me back to secondary school, where I shared an interest in Asimov (among many other things) with Prav. I was totally enamoured with the concept of psychohistory, and this was one of the first manifestations of my interest in psychology. I still remember borrowing this book from the library in MRSM Taiping, where it hadn’t been checked out for years. I was tempted to just keep it for myself (using the logic that it’s going to be put to waste) but my dad raised an eyebrow and that was that.

This novel is the fifth in the series, and opens with Councilman Golan Trevize pondering if he was right to choose a collective mind (Gaia) as the best possible future for humanity (as opposed to the chaos of various individuals, nations and planets). To appease himself, he decides he must know the past and goes in search of Earth – the origin of man whose references to have been erased from galactic libraries.

The book is filled with philosophical ponderings about man and his future, and has tie-ins to Asimov's Robot series. There seems to be elements of ‘the gospel according to Asimov’ and this isn’t the best of the series. It’s one of the more controversial with references to homosexuality and such taboos, but more importantly, I’m gonna get it just to complete my collection.

3. The Bloody Chamber – Angela Carter

I’ve always been a fan of fairy tales and Disney movies, but this book added a piece of realism to the tales I grew up with that made it that much more enjoyable to an adolescent me. These short stories are re-enactments of fairy tales, stories that have very familiar themes, like tragic love stories, werewolf stories and Cinderella-like stories with additional elements of sex and magical realism. I remember being rather disturbed by them (I think Sleeping Beauty was a slut) but this is probably one of the better examples of dark literature. Also explains my interest in Fables (by DC Vertigo) I think.

4. The Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World – Haruki Murakami

Long before Murakami became the ‘in’ thing, I came across this book of his that was rather fascinating to little ol’ me. I can’t say if it’s his best work since I haven’t actually read any of his other books, but it’s definitely on my little list of recommended reading.

The story is split in two, with additional schizophrenic elements. The narrator exists in two separate versions of reality, but it is uncertain whether they are parallel or chronological. It’s all very philosophical and makes the reader wonder about existence and how momentary an experience it is - Murakami allows no thought for the past or future, since you inevitably can’t do much about it and so one must live in the present, which brings about a number of ‘what-ifs’ e.g. what if everything that you call "you" is only one side of a multi-dimensional figure? What if that figure depends entirely on your choices from moment to moment? And what influences these choices and are you really able to do much about it? Kinda Matrix-like to a certain degree, but I was confused when I first read it, and I’m hoping to re-read ‘cause I’ll probably be able to appreciate it on a different level.

5. A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court – Mark Twain

Mark Twain is one of those authors that I never quite got to grips with, along with other American literary greats like Poe. But one of his works that caught my eye was this book, a rather humourous take on the medieval story of the Knights of the Round Table.

A guy (can’t remember his name) hits his head and wakes up a few centuries earlier. Using his knowledge of an upcoming eclipse, he escapes a death sentence (I think James Cook did the same thing once in some island somewhere), and secures an important position at court. He gradually introduces technology, thus granting himself an easy life in Camelot. Many of the well-known Arthurian characters make their appearances, and it’s a funny look into the conditions of men and how much a role (or not) technology and ‘modern’ thinking play in our lives.

6. The Dying Earth – Jack Vance

This is one of the first collection of short stories that I managed to convince myself to read. The stories (which are more fantasy than sci-fi) are loosely linked through the setting attributed of a dying earth, existing far in the future. I think this was the first story that was set in such an apocalyptic scenario. Most of the stories are about magicians, and the stories come to life due to the descriptive detail given to them, and it helps create an understanding of this world and its people. The stories are also funny at times, and secondary players in the stories often appear elsewhere as the main character, thus ensuring continuity. The collection might not appeal to women as there are elements of misogyny e.g. one of the stories is basically some sort of battle of the sexes. A sorceress tried to undermine the wizards by turning them into females. She is eventually defeated by summoning her earlier male nemesis who counters her magic, as well as stating that all could be resolved if the sorceress would abandon her demands for power and succumb to his magnetism and desire.

7. Witches Abroad – Terry Pratchett

This is the first Pratchett book from his Discworld series that I had the opportunity to read, and like most of the books in this series, it’s awfully funny. I never quite realized how long these books have been around, ‘till SMA pointed it out to me a few weeks back.
This book is about witches going abroad, as one might gather from the title. There are rules in the Discworld, and one of it is that godmothers come in pairs, and when one dies, another has to replace her. In this story, a witch (once again, can’t remember her name) does not foresee her death (due to being certain amount of carelessness) and a successor has to be picked without the appropriate training. The new witch, along with another couple of ‘em, also have a urgent mission – they must travel to some far off place and prevent a young woman from kissing a frog. They set off, along with a charming little kitty who happens to be rather oversexed, and burn a trail in which nobody (not even vampires and werewolves) are left unscathed. Lovely satirism from Pratchett.

8. Maus : A Survivor’s Tale – Art Spielgeman

I haven’t read this comic yet, but it’s supposed to be damn good. After all, the winner of a Pullitzer should definitely have something going for it! It’s meant to be a Holocaust literature that looks at the experience of the author’s father as a Jewish survivor from the second world war. The first thing that strikes the reader when he reads it (or flips through it as I did) is that the characters have heads of animals. What the author did was draw various groups of people with different heads - Jews have mice heads, the Germans are cats, the Americans dogs etc. It is visually provocative, and I guess one would have felt that way if one lived through such a period in time where your ethnicity determined the life that you will be allowed to live.

9. Johnathan Strange and Mr Norrell – Susanna Clarke

Another book I haven’t read that has intrigued me. Why? Can’t think of any other reason besides the usual curiosity about critically acclaimed books that delve into the mystical. Plus, it’s been compared to Harry Potter. In this book, Mr. Norrell is the first practical magician in England in hundreds of years. He moves to London to establish his influence in government circles, devising such powerful illusions as an 11-day blockade of French ports by English ships fabricated from rainwater. His vanity proves to be a problem though, and the differing ambitions of his more glamorous apprentice, Jonathan Strange, threaten to topple his achievements.

10. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince – J.K.Rowling

Nice and easy

Had a slow start to the day. Think I was busy 'snoozing' for the better part of an hour. What I need is this clock. Ought to make life more manageable, or just annoy the hell out of you.

Some things are meant to be savoured slowly though. I've been told that I have this habit (especially when it comes to food) of doing things slowly, with my eyes occasionally half-closed, as I enjoy 'the moment'. And why not? Chewing a juicy steak, listening to the piano version of Canon in D, eating Lindt's praline chocolate, breathing in fresh air after a heavy downpour, smelling the sweet scent of Sweetie - are just a few of the experiences that should be enjoyed to its fullest.

One of my favourite things in life is listening to classical music, and one of my favourite forms of classical music is choral work. Think 'For unto Him a Child is Born' from Handel's Messiah. There's just something about the harmony of voices that can make one get lost within the various movements. Which is probably one of the reasons I enjoyed Les Choristes (The Chorus), which I watched with a few friends over at the Tyneside Cinema last night.

The story is set in post-war France, and takes place in a boarding school for troubled children called Le Fond De L'Etang, which translates to 'Rock Bottom'. This should automatically give one an image of the school - kinda run-down, the kids causing an atmosphere of almost-constant chaos, with teachers who either have nowhere else to go or are remarkably dedicated.

A new teacher, Mathieu, arrives on the scene. He's a rather pitiful-looking character, but this appearance of being a 'sad-case' masks a rather intelligent individual who's not only talented, but is also witty and seems to have a knack for connecting with the students. To cut a long story short, he uses his ability as a musician to form a choir - an act that not only gets the students' attention, but also helps toward improving their general attitude towards life.

It's not the first movie to showcase the struggle of a teacher in wanting his students to 'reach beyond the stars', and it's probably not as good as Dead Poets' Society. But it's definitely up there, and makes up for the predictable material with rather good acting (Gerard Jugnot is plays the teacher who's both inspiring and emotionally wounded), a simplicity in its cinematography that is instantly appealing, endearing characters that make you want to both laugh and cry, and most of all, a magnificiently haunting title score that I'm still humming along to. Beyonce definitely didn't do it justice at the Oscars.

After the movie, Jo n I had a nice relaxing chat over some lovely coffee and tiramisu. Was joined by RH and her friend, who I've always heard about but never actually met. Next movie we'll be watching at the Tyneside is probably gonna be Downfall, a rather interesting-looking movie about the fall of the Third Reich from the German point of view.

Psyc

Finally finished my psychiatry rotation. The assessments went well, and I'm pretty satisfied with my written assignment as well. Have to say that I'm glad it's finally over, 'cause I wasn't exactly having the time of my life during the last week of Old Age Psychiatry. Kinda felt that what I got out of it wasn't really worth the hassle of travel.

On the bright side, some patients were extremely friendly and nice. Then again, some were plain loonies. As you might expect from a psychiatric ward. One lady chased me around the ward 'cause she had taken blue pills instead of red ones. That sounded suspiciously like a page taken off The Matrix. Another kept interrupting me every 5 minutes to tell me 'What nice teeth you have...'. Which I don't. Then again, it might look nice to someone who's been wearing dentures for the better part of the last 3 decades... Sigh... One thing's for sure, I hope I never get dementia. Along with all the other scary stuff I've been learning these past few years.

The staff there are pretty odd as well. One consultant wears the most garish of clothes, a textbook example of mania. Another sits at a corner mumbling to himself and playing with his hair. Odd? You bet. Surprisingly, they turn into the most charming individuals when they're talking to their patients. They've probably got so good at talking to those who have mental health conditions that they've lost the ability to interact well with those who haven't. Jo's so gonna give these people the shock of their lives - they'll be wondering how a good-looking, normal person has landed in their midst...

As I was flicking through one of the 'bibles' of psychiatry, I came across a section on culturally-determined hysterical conditions, neurotic symptoms that have contents that comply with society's expectations e.g. bulimia, anorexia. Some conditions that are particular to Malaysia was noted. I was slightly amused, but it did bring certain stories from back home to mind.

1. Amok - probably the most famous of the conditions. Patients undergo a dissociative state where they're depersonalised, full of rage and violence, undergo automatism and neurasthenia as well.

2. Latah - a condition akin to hysteria that's characterised by hypersuggestibility, autonomic obedience, coprolalia (repetitively saying obscene words), echolalia (repetition of words spoken by another person), echopraxia (repeating another's actions), altered consciousness, disorganisation, anxiety and depression. Kinda reminds me of those cases you hear about schoolgirls 'kena rasuk' and going all hysterical. And is this based on the word 'melatah'? One wonders...

3. Koro - a hyperchondrical delusion where there is the definite believe that the penis is shrinking into the abdomen and that this will lead to one's death. It's accompanied by extreme anxiety (duh!) and is a manifestation of folk belief concerning sexual exhaustion. Sounds like a story told by the elders as a method of family planning to me. Either that, or it must've been a cold cold day... Apparently it had reached epidemic levels amongst the Malays in Singapore. And apparently the word's from the word 'kura', the good ol' tortoise. The analogy being the tortoise retracts its head, which is similar to the penis disappearing.

Spring

You know spring has arrived when the sun's shining through your window at 630 in the morning, you're able to not only walk around without a coat but actually the feel the heat of the sun's rays, when you see various bees and ladybirds buzzing around while their friend, the poor stupid little earthworms get trampled on, and when you're able to deeply inhale the fresh morning air without collapsing into a coughing fit.

Ladies and gentlemen, here's looking forward to brighter weather.

Most interesting piece of news this week comes from Florida, where the Court of Appeal has denied the reinsertion of a feeding tube for Terri Schiavo, a lady who's been in a vegetative state since an accident in 1990. Basic story is that her husband wants her off the feeding tube (an act that will lead to her death since she can't feed herself) 'cause that's what she would've wanted (i.e. dying with dignity) wherelse her parents have stated that they disagree with that act.

Enter the US Congress and goverment. President Bush authorised a delay in removing the tube,citing his (and the Republicans') belief in the sanctity of life. Which is pretty rich, coming from a man who sent dozens of men to the gallows as Governor of Texas, and is responsible for the death of (probably) 100 000 civilians in Iraq. George Orwell would've been proud of such 'doublethink'.

Personally, I agree with the court's decision. The poor lady has been in such a state for a long time, and is only alive because of the machines attached to her. There is no indication whatsoever that her condition will improve, and prolonging the event (especially when she would not have wanted to be in such a state) is tantamount to disrespecting her autonomy and basic human rights. It is obscene to justify the reinsertion of her tube on the basis of wanting to win the popular vote or to just make one feel better about one's self. And do bear in mind that this case is quite distinct from euthansia or having the right to die.

So much for spring's cheerful mood.

Movies

Having finished my essay, I decided to take the rest of the day off and give myself a treat. So I ended up at the movies with a tiramisu-flavoured ice-cream in one hand, and a large muffin in the other. Not to mention some crisps and juice in the bag.

First movie I watched was Constantine, which was every bit as good as it was made out to be. Which is a huge compliment, I think, 'cause most of the movies that I watch with high expectations almost always end up being a disappointment. Keanu's still kayu-ish, and I can't help but think that Brad Pitt would've been more suitably casted for the role. Actually, it's been years since I've last read Hellblazer. In fact, I've probably seen more of Constantine in his guest appearances in other comics such as the Books of Magic and Zatanna rather than in Hellblazer itself.




Hitch was a good watch as well, and was quite amusing albeit fairly predictable. But I guess that's the case with most romantic comedies. You won't be treated to a surprise twist at the end where the guy gets his brains blown out and the girl runs away with his brother's friend's father-in-law. Eva Mendes wasn't as hot as I remember though. Hahaha... However I wouldn't recommend watching the movie by yourself if your significant other being far away. Not the most pleasant of experiences.

Almost as good as the movies were the trailers I watched. Caught my first sight of the Scarecrow in the first full Batman:Begins trailer I saw, was totally impressed with the Sin City trailer (I just love the way the movie's been shot - so very true to Frank Miller's vision. Guess it helps that he's playing a huge role in the direction of the movie) and I could've sworn I had palpitations as I laid eyes on the Revenge of the Sith trailer for the very first time. Here's hoping the movie's not going to be disappointing, 'cause as Sweetie pointed out, trailer Star Wars semua pun best.




Went home and had a relaxed evening which ended with me watching Scent of a Woman. It's one of those movies which I've seen bits and pieces of, but never really sat through the whole thing. It's a great movie which showcased one of Pacino's best-ever performance, and he was deservely awarded an Oscar for it.

Bounce

Was feeling rather miserable yesterday. Probably due to a mixture of things.

First of all, the bloody thumb was throbbing painfully all day long. I guess it wasn’t bad enough for me to seek painkillers, although I'm sure the usual analgesia would’ve been pretty useless. There was this urge to slash it off, but considering the number of nerve endings in it, that’ll only make things worse. Thankfully, it’s a heck of a lot better today. It has finally clotted up and as long as I don’t bend the interphalangeal joint, I’m A-ok.

It doesn’t really help that the one sunshine in my life is far across the oceans. Or continents, rather. Missing out on an opportunity to mengada. Hahaha... one of my paeds consultant once told me that she could easily specialise in treating men, 'cause they act like kids when they're injured/sick. And I'm inclined to believe her.

Haven’t been able to talk to Sweetie for as long as usual this past week, and I guess I was suffering from yet another acute attack of the MURSOS. All I could think about yesterday was the various ways in which I’d love to spoil her if she was right next to me. Those who complain about long-distance relationships when their partner is in the same country have no idea what they’re complaining about.

I guess I was also feeling rather lonely. Not due to the lack of people around me, but rather more due to the fact that I return each day to an empty house. My housemates have made the rather unsurprising decision that they won’t be returning. I’m not shocked, but neither am I a very happy bunny. I’m quite fed up with having to deal with the consequences of their departure – the bills, rent, and other issues that keep creeping up at a time when I do not want anything unnecessary to throw a spanner into the works.

I know I’ve got a few friends around me who’d welcome me with open arms, and I’m eternally grateful for having them around. Heck, I'm even mr pseudo-housemate. But I guess I start feeling rather intrusive after a while. At least I know they’re there though, and they do bother to make sure I’m ok and keep me company and such, as compared to others who only call up when they need something.

Sisters aren’t doing much better either.

Came to the rather belated conclusion that I’m going to have to face my finals alone without much moral support from those around me. Besides the fact that I’m by myself, others will also be busy with their finals and my loved ones will only be able to encourage me over the phone. Self-discipline ain't exactly one of my strong points, and it’s amazingly difficult to do when you’re by yourself. Never quite appreciated it before, but I think I’m getting the hang of it. Hopefully!

Looking on the bright side, the time I’ve wasted these past few days have finally borne fruit. Finished my psychiatry essay. All 4500 words of it. Which means I’ll be spending the next few days trying to get rid of a thousand words (at least).

In the latest episode of my series of impulsive purchases, I got myself a last-minute ticket to watch a classical performance last night at The Sage. Thankfully, NUS card holders get a rather amazing 50% discount, so I managed to get a pretty good seat.

I have to say that The Sage itself is an amazing work of art. It’s the first building to be designed for the performing arts by Lord Foster, and the whole concept of working from the inside out (i.e. designing the building around the acoustics) was strikingly noticeable. I was at Hall One, (a 1700-capacity concert hall with a rather minimalist design) which had amazing acoustics. I could’ve sworn that I was able to hear every pizzicato, and I wasn’t the only one raving about it. I quite liked the wooden finish, and the oval design looking down on the orchestra from 360 degrees was a nice touch as well.

The night consisted of performances on French pieces by the Northern Sinfonia, with Thierry Fischer conducting. The most famous piece was probably Satie’s rather ethereal Deux gymnopedies. There was also a rather weird (in other words I sat there going ‘what the hell?’) piece in the middle by some British guy called Mark-Anthony Turnage.

The reason I had decided to go for the night’s event was to listen to Ravel’s Piano Concerto in G major, as played by Pascal Roge, who’s a rather famous French pianist. Perhaps unsurprisingly, he specialises in French music. It was a joy watching him play, and I’m pretty sure my jaw was on the floor at numerous occasions.

My favourite piece of the night was Le boeuf sur le toit by Milhaud. I have to confess that I was not familiar with his works, but this piece was thoroughly enjoyable. Apparently the name of the piece translates to ‘the cow on the roof’ or something like that, so you can imagine the playfulness of the piece. This was more evident because there were obvious jazz influences in the piece, and this piece actually served to kick-off the International Jazz Festival that is being held at The Sage.

I found out during the night that the folks sitting on either side of me were both doctors. So, I ended up chatting with them about medicine and having a rather intense conversation about the changes in healthcare that we’re experiencing. And there I was hoping for a relaxing evening… it was a good chat though, but I felt rather intimidated ‘cause these folks looked rather classy and were well-dressed and there I was in a t shirt, jeans and the only French I knew was 'parlez vous anglais?'. And Voulez vous couche avec moi?, which isn't exactly useful. I was also probably the only person within visible distance who did not sport grey hair.

It was a fun night though, and I’ve already made plans to bring Sweetie over sometime in the future. And next time, I’ll try to plan on catching a show earlier and try to drag someone along. It’ll be good to watch a show with someone else who has a similar interest, but it’ll also be fun to watch it with someone who’s squirming in his/her seat and trying their darnest to not fall asleep…

Thumbs up!

Was making myself a sandwich and humming along to Little Sister, which was playing over the telly, when suddenly -Zzing!!- I felt an odd sting in my thumb, which was followed by one helluva pain. I looked down and stared at the blood that was literally pouring out of my thumb, and the tabletop that was slowly turning a rather pleasant shade of scarlet.

Took me a good 5 minutes of cursing and pressure before I managed to stop the bleeding. Wincing, I proceeded to wash the wound and have a good look at it. Think it's pretty deep, and the fact that a rather well-demarcated region of skin is still rather numb makes me worry about nerve damage. Ah hell, just hope it gets better 'cause it's bloody (literally) difficult trying to do things without a thumb. All I can say is thank God for clotting factors!

And in another sign that we're heading towards hell on earth, Bush is planning to nominate Paul Wolfowitz (the deputy defense secretary aka big time neo-con motherfucker) as president of the World Bank.

The art of being pretentious

I have no patience for pretentious people.

It’s all well and good that you’re well-versed in the intricacies of the summer offerings by the various fashion houses, or that you own an expensive piece of item that just happened to have been given to you ‘cause you’re such a lovely person. But does one really need to talk about it all the freaking time? In a voice that could probably be heared over at Devon? Or is there any need to look down on others who aren't 'up to your standards'?

I guess saying ‘that’s nice’ once isn’t enough, although saying it a dozen times probably wouldn’t come packaged with a very sincere look on my face.

I don't understand why some people can't be happy with who they really are. Always after the latest items in an effort to be 'stylish' and 'fashionable', always believing in their self-certified right to be at the centre of the universe. If there was a way to focus the Sun's entire rays of light onto him/her, you can bet they'd get to it. Who cares if they get burnt to a crisp, at least the lights were focused on them.

I can think of a few people I know who're pretty adept at being pretentious at times. Latest case occured this morning. Mr X was babbling on about how great Russin music was during the Romantic/Modern era, and how it's the latest 'in' thing among his circle of friends. I was steadily getting annoyed with his obvious self-congratulating manner, and when he started to comment on Bartok, I decided to quietly point out that Bartok wasn't not only not Russian, but he was heavily influenced by German and Austrian composers. Thankfully, the idiot decided to lower his voice after that.

But if wanting to be pretentious is your thing, here’s a humorous guide for you to read.

Extra! Extra!

The place where I'll be working (if all goes well) this summer is in the news. And not for a very good reason either. The NHS was confronted yesterday with a potentially devastating blow to its finances after Unison, the public service union, won the biggest ever equal pay award to compensate a group of underpaid women staff.

The union struck a deal with North Cumbria Acute NHS Trust on behalf of 1,500 women working at two hospitals in Carlisle and Whitehaven. It will give each of them between £35,000 and £200,000 after an employment tribunal decided they had suffered pay discrimination since 1991. Think the total bill can run up to approx. £300 million.

Although this is claimed to be a decision based on regional circumstances, the decision would undeniably open floodgates throughout the health service.

I guess it's good that the payment system is being forced to restructure, but one thing that seemed to have been ignored is the fact that some cases weren't based on similar situations. I've also got a thing against payment of vast sums of money via the court, because I believe it promotes an atmosphere of litigation more than anything else.

What's the point of pumping in vast sums of money into the NHS if half of it is going to be spent in court? Might as well write blank cheques to the lawyers (no offense to those in the law profession). Nobody wants to spend more money on it, and the way some people here bitch and moan about the NHS... I'd love for the government to take it away for a month and make them realise what lucky bastards they are.

Mo Cuishla

Finally watched Million Dollar Baby on Friday night. Good show, and it definitely deserved the awards it won during Oscar night. It was a joy watching the talents of Clint Eastwood, Morgan Freeman and Hilary Swank at their best, and I was definitely impressed with Swank's skipping skills. Actually teared as well - I guess some bits were a bit too close to home.

Caught up with Liza last night after a (in retrospect) surprisingly long hiatus. Was treated to dinner along with CT n Yus. Managed to catch up on things, as well as received the usual teasing and good-natured-name-calling. Have to say I wasn't on par last night, and probably didn't give as good as I received. Yus n Liz together are a dangerous combination... Will have to practise harder on these 'skills' of mine.

A dear friend of mine came over for a night. She wasn't exactly around for long, but there was enough time to catch up on lots of stuff, hang out, watch a movie, eat some nice breakfast, admire the bridges of the quayside, admire the view from the Baltic, drink a few cups of coffee and comment about the weather. Was good to meet up with her again, although I do sympathise with her horrible journey back home (having to change at 3 stations due to engineering work).

One thing that I have to agree with Yus is about being on time/keeping one's promises. I get really pissed off when someone's late or doesn't fulfill a promise/appointment without giving an adequate explanation.Kalau sekali takpe, but when it has happened a few times, it just shows a lackadaisical attitude and disrespect for another person's time. If I am running late, I do try to call in advance or if I'm late for a class, I'd prefer to skip it rather than be coming in too late. None of this janji Melayu crap. But that's just me I guess.

On a more cheerful note, best of luck to Sweetie on the start of her new job! Here's hoping the first day goes well. Congrats also on your 'Weapon of Mass Destruction'. Can't wait to have a look at it!

M'sian Nite 2005

Yet another sign of Americanism.

Woke up this morning, looked at the clock, and decided to go back to bed. Woke up again, decided to play my cards right, and that was followed by a rather leisurely morning. Was smiling as I walked to town, and realised that it was because of the fact that not only was the sun shining, but I was actually able to feel its heat... Decided to take a detour, and proceeded go for a walk as well as to feed some swans and ducks and whatever other birds that tend to go swimming in lakes. Being in a rather good mood, I even decided to invite some friends over for dinner tonight.

Had a rather late night. The M'sian Night was pretty successful. And unlike previous years, there was actually an excess of food. I was on guard duty, so I arrived rather early along with Yus n the girls, minus Em. Ate early, did a few random jobs here and there, took a few pics, and then settled into my place. Halfway through though, I was asked to chat with the guest of honours, so in an odd twist of events, I found myself enjoying the performances from the front row. Not that I'm complaining!

Performances were included a duo, Jeffri Ramli (with his usual rendition of I'll Always Love You) and your typical stuff in a M'sian Night - various traditional dances, of which the bhangra was probably the most infectious. There was a sketch in between the dances, and I congratulated Imaan later on her convincing portrayal of 'gedikness'.

Lots of pics were taken, of which many will be going up online in various blogs soon, I'm sure. Times like this I feel like I should've gotten myself a digital camera, but I've promised myself to only get it at a particular date, so I'll just have to wait I guess.

Things finished relatively early, and we were waiting for the bus by 11. Got a call to go to The Attic, which was the venue of the 'after party'. Wasn't too keen initially, but was told that my cousin will be celebrating his b'day as well, so figured why the hell not. Can't remember the last time I went clubbing, probably last summer back home. Ended up having a really good time, hanging out with a few buddies and meeting new folks as well as 'dancing' along to some pretty good music. We only got out towards 3am, after which I grabbed a cab home, called Sweetie to share the night's events and drifted off to The Dreaming.

Eat, drink, football

Remember I said that Bowl of Oranges is one of the best songs I've heard so far this year? Well, last night I came across the video clip of the song that is almost definitely the worst I've heard so far this year. Britney Spear's Do Somethin'. Also came to the conclusion that she reminds me of a chav. No offense to the legions of Britney fans out there.

A girl scored 17 A1s in her SPM. Fucking hell...

AC Milan are through to the quarter-finals, having defeated Man Utd! And we did it rather convincingly as well! Had a long argument with Radzi last night, who insists that Milan is the epitome of the Italian defensive football philosophy of holding on to the ball and not attacking. While I do agree that defense is given a prominent place in its strategies, I do think that AC Milan are one of the few teams that actually do have a tendency to be adventurous and attack instead of staying in their own half for 90% of the game. Why? 'cause of their superb defense.

I do believe that defensive football can be beautiful at times, but more importantly, it's the bedrock of a team's performance. During the high point of AC Milan's victorious reign over a decade ago, (the 1994 4-0 victory in the final of the European Cup against Barcelona), they had what is argued to be one of the best defences ever. And this allowed them freedom to venture forward, knowing that they were well-covered at the rear. Despite the retirement of the dutch trio, I remember quite well how Savicevic (or however it is you spell his name) dominated the attack, and it is this mixture of using your brains as well as playing with your heart that has made me a fan of AC Milan since I first set eyes on Van Basten's extraordinary performances in the Serie A back in the late 1980s.

Of course, I'm biased.

Attended an eating disorder clinic this morning. Proved to be rather interesting. Met a few girls who were happy to chat, but weren't too happy to discuss details of their diet. Surprise surprise. One of 'em only eats a lettuce and a carrot a day, and I had to prevent my best from just reaching over and patting her hand and saying 'you poor thing.' After each consultation, my supervisor and I would share a bar of chocolate, thanking God that we're able to enjoy the simple pleasures of life.

It is interesting to note the psychological history of these individuals, and the events that have lead them to have such a distorted body image. While almost everybody would love to lose some weight, there's the more severe case of some complaining about being fat even when they're a size 6 or less. It's amazing how much influence society and the media can have on a person. And what has made this person believe that their size/beauty is directly proportional to the amount of love that will be showered upon them? What's the point of being loved just because you look hot in the latest summer outfit? After all, beauty is most definitely skin deep, and it does not last.

But it is difficult for me to put myself in their shoes. After all, people ain't exactly nice and you do get jerks who make fun of overweight girls, only to go drooling all over the floor when she's lost a bit of weight. How are people like that supposed to feel? I do have a number of friends who've had eating disorders in the past, but at times I wouldn't really know what to do. All I am able to do is try to make them change their point of view (and changing someone's mind ain't exactly easy) and assure them that whatever love that is shown to them by anyone isn't, or rather shouldn't, be based on a distorted view of physical aspects only.

Books, books, books

I finally had the chinese food that I was craving for during lunch on Saturday. I think visiting The Yellow Tree will be a regular fixture each time I go to Glasgow. We walked about town after that, and I decided to get myself a copy of Jeff Smith's Bone - the entire series in a thick, 1300+ page book. And was it worth it? Hell Yeah. That pretty much kept me occupied on the train trip to Newcastle, along with a bucket of M&S's chocolate-covered cornflakes mini bites. Just like the kuih we have back home. Am about 60% done with the book now, and I'm guessing I'll be finishing it tonight...

Yesterday was a relatively relaxing day. Chatted with Sweetie, told my parents about the ticket home I just purchased, listened to more stories about my sisters and towards the end of the day, was fed by Ct n Yus. Ct's famous masak kicap was on the menu, and that helped satisfy everyone's hunger pangs (everyone being the 3 of us, Yus' buddies from London and a couple of other girls).

Woke up this morning and watched the news with interest. Giuliana Sgrena was commenting on her views that the Americans had deliberately shot at the car she was in and murdered Nicola Calipari. Iran was making concessions in order to placate the West. Afghanistan is now heroin capital of the world (by a long run). And Syria (pretty much the only other Middle Eastern country that isn't kow-towing to the Americans and who happens to be a sworn enemy of Israel) is also trying to smother the flames that are crackling in Lebanon. Is it just me or are the Americans getting pretty much what they want? Military manouevres in Iraq, Machiavellian ones in Lebanon. And the opposition is gonna welcome them with open arms. Kinda reminiscent of Reformasi.

Realised I was running late, and hurriedly got dressed. Was with my supervisor this morning and she had warned me earlier that she places a high emphasis on punctuality, and she will not hessitate to mark me down if I'm late for things. Got there on time, and what happened? The silly cow was late herself. Wonder if that means she'll have to give me extra merit points?

The morning session was good though, 'cause she's a pretty pleasant person who's good at teaching. Had a chat about various things - satyriasis (the male equivalent of nymphomania), anti-depressants, eating disorders (her specialty), erotomania (a psychological disorder in which the patients relentlessly pursues the notion that the object of his/her affection reciprocates his/her romantic feelings and/or fantasies. In other words, believing someone loves you when he/she doesn't) and the idea that happiness is actually a psychiatric disorder, since it actually fulfills all the diagnostic criteria of one.

Finished the day rather earlier than expected, so I made the decision to have a leisurely walk around town (Mq, this would be one of those 'blue moon' episodes). Was in a rather good mood for a number of reasons - the morning went well, Sweetie gave me some excellent news, and I guess I was being rather care-free and silly on the whole.

Being in a good mood can be expensive though. Had lunch at Subway (was planning to go to Pret, but decided the bread in Subway is wayyy tastier) and proceeded to Fenwick and John Lewis. Did a lil window shopping, but I couldn't find what I was looking for. Followed by a bulk purchase of brownies and loads of chocolates (I highly recommend Lindt's Hazelnut Pralines). Went on to get some tea from Whittards, and ended up with 3 books in my bag - Salman Rushdie's The Satanic Verses, Kazuo Ishiguro's When We Were Orphans and Karen Armstrong's Islam - A Short History. Books that I've heard of before but never actually read. Of course, the next question is when exactly will I be able to read them...

Bowl of Oranges

The music video clip in my sidebar is of the song 'Bowl of Oranges' by Conor Oberst aka Bright Eyes. First heard it a couple of months back, and it has since grown to be one of my fav songs of the year so far.

The rain, it started tapping on the window near my bed.
There was a loophole in my dreaming,
so I got out of it. And to my surprise my eyes were wide
and already open.
Just my nightstand and my dresser where those nightmares had just been.
So I dressed myself and left then, out into the gray streets.
But everything seemed different and completely new to me.
The sky, the trees, houses, buildings, even my own body.
And each person I encountered, I couldn't wait to meet.
I came upon a doctor who appeared in quite poor health.
I said "{I am terribly sorry but} there is nothing I can do for you{that} you can't do for yourself."
He said "Oh yes you can. Just hold my hand. I think that would help."
So I sat with him a while and then I asked him how he felt.
He said, "I think I'm cured. No, in fact, I'm sure.
Thank you Stranger, for your therapeutic smile."
So that is how I learned the lesson that everyone is alone.
And your eyes must do some raining if you are ever going to grow.
But when crying don't help and you can't compose yourself.
It is best to compose a poem, an honest verse of longing or simple song of hope.
That is why I'm singing...
Baby don't worry cause now I got your back.
And every time you feel like crying,I'm gonna try and make you laugh.
And if I can't, if it just hurts too bad,then we will wait for it to pass
and I will keep you company through those days so long and black.
And we'll keep working on the problem we know we'll never solve
Of Love's uneven remainders, our lives are fractions of a whole.
But if the world could remain within a frame like a painting on a wall.
Then I think we would see the beauty.
Then we would stand staring in awe at our still lives
posed like a bowl of oranges,
like a story told by the fault lines and the soil.

[Note: words in {} are not actually sung]

B'day Party

Am currently writing from Mq's room. Woke up relatively early, and since everyone else is still asleep after a long night (it was her b'day party last night), I decided to spend some time on the computer and do some random internet surfing. Something which I haven't done in a while.

Got over to Glasgow yesterday afternoon, along with Em and 10kgs of marinaded chicken. Yup, no joke. Wasn't the most anticipated of experiences, but luckily the chicken didn't stink up the whole carriage! Actually managed to spend some time reading on the train, which was another minor miracle. Guess I was making sure that I will not feel guilty later on, since I'll be spending more time today indulging in the art of mental relaxation, and Yus has a couple of friends staying over at my place, and I don't think it'll be very appropriate if the host spends all his time in the room.

My arrival was meant to be a surprise for Mq, and to a certain degree it worked. Was nice to see her grinning from ear to ear throughout the whole day. While Em n CW worked on the chicken, Mq and I went shopping. I kept insisting that we were getting too much stuff, but I guess it was better to err on that side of the equation rather than having too little food. Went to a food store called Peckham's, which was akin to a mini Harrod's food store. My pupils were probably constricted to the size of a pinprick as I went all excited at the sight of the cheesecakes )Mq's b'day cake was an Oreos cheesecake), lovely homemade jams and cheese and the huge variety of rather interesting looking ice-creams and such.

At the end of the day, everything was prepared in time. The highlight was probably the fact that about 9 different tubs of ice-cream were left for us to savour, with about a similar amount of toppings as well. Think we were all diabetic by the end of last night, and more than one person exhibiting signs of being on a sugar high. 'Big' surprise there...

Met Oja n Ellina, and as usual it was chatting with 'em. There were quite a number of people, and every once in a while I'd go and chat with some of them. The fact that my stomach was ready to burst didn't exactly put me in the most sociable of moods! But luckily it was a fun crowd, so it didn't actually take much effort.

At the end, I was the only guy left with about 10 girls. Although I wasn't feeling that tired, I decided to retire in order to allow them to let their hair down. Literally. From the sound of the shrieks and squeeks, I'm sure they had loads of fun though! Luckily enough for me, Sweetie was awake at the time, so I had the opportunity to have a chat with her before dozing off. Turned out to be a happy ending to a happy day.

A tale of 2 movies

MirrorMask, a movie coming from the minds of comic legends Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean, will be hitting the UK shores soon. It was well received at the recent Sundance Film Festival, and yes, I'm bloody looking forward to it...






MirrorMask centers on Helena, a 15 year old girl in a family of circus entertainers, who often wishes she could run off and join real life. After a fight with her parents about her future plans, her mother falls quite ill and Helena is convinced that it is all her fault. On the eve of her mother's major surgery, she dreams that she is in a strange world with two opposing queens, bizarre creatures, and masked inhabitants. All is not well in this new world - the white queen has fallen ill and can only be restored by the MirrorMask, and it's up to Helena to find it. But as her adventures continue, she begins to wonder whether she's in a dream, or something far more sinister.


Sin City is written and directed by Robert Rodriguez and Frank Miller, hitting cinemas in the States on April 1st. With Miller and Rodriguez at the helm, and with the help of such a stellar cast, it's yet another movie that I'll be eagerly anticipating.






Sin City, based on the series of graphic novels created, written, and illustrated by Miller, is infested with criminals, crooked cops and sexy dames, some searching for vengeance, some for redemption and others, both. The film incorporates storylines from three of Miller's graphic novels including "Sin City," which launched the long-running, critically acclaimed series, as well as "That Yellow Bastard" and "The Big Fat Kill." Rodriguez, along with Miller, translated these legendary stories from page to screen by remaining absolutely faithful to the look, feel and dialogue of the books.

Sin City stars Bruce Willis as Hartigan, a cop with a bum ticker and a vow to protect stripper Nancy (Jessica Alba); Mickey Rourke as Marv, the outcast misanthrope on a mission to avenge the death of his one true love, Goldie (Jaime King), and Clive Owen as Dwight, the clandestine love of Shelley (Brittany Murphy), who spends his nights defending Gail (Rosario Dawson) and her Old Towne girls (Devon Aoki and Alexis Bledel) from Jackie Boy (Benicio Del Toro), a dirty cop with a penchant for violence. Elijah Wood, Nick Stahl, Michael Madsen, Carla Gugino and Michael Clarke Duncan are also part of the ensemble cast.

There's no business like show business...

Here’s an excerpt off the latest news around the movie adaptation of V for Vendetta :


Natalie Portman is set to star in ‘V for Vendetta’, the latest Alan Moore-written comic to hit Hollywood. Portman will play Evey Hammond, a donw-on-her-luck English woman who becomes enraptured with a revolutionary vigilante known only as ‘V’

Set in an Orwellian alternate future, ‘Vendetta’ portrays the struggle of V, a mystery man that fights to overthrown a fascist British government. When not firebombing the Parliament or terrorizing the Secret Police, V introduces Evey to literature, music and ideas that have long since been lost to the masses while a romance develops between the pair.

‘Matrix’ masterminds Joel Silver and the Wachowski brothers are producing the gilmy, which Silver describes as an ‘uncompromising vision of the future driven by a totally original superhero.’

Larry and Andy Wachowski have transformed ‘Vendetta’ – originally a 10-issue mini-series by Moore and David Lloyd in 1988 – into a screenplay. James McTeigue, the first assistant director from the ‘Matrix’ gets his first shot in the director’s chair. Portman and the rest of the as-yet-undecided cast will arrive in Berlin this March to start principal photography, with the film set to be released in Nov 2005.

Am looking forward to watching Constantine, which has received pretty good reviews (even from Sweetie, who thinks Keanu is rather kayu-ish in his acting). There’s also Wolverine : The Movie, Fantastic Four, X3, Spidey 3, Superman (which will have the enigmatic Kevin Spacey as Lex Luthor), Batman Begins (how can it possibly go wrong??) and Revenge of the Sith (which hopefully won’t go wrong…) to look forward to. March 21 will see the release (in the US) of the final season of the Star Wars : Clone Wars cartoon series, leading up to the final movie’s release in May. And this time, each episode will last 12 mins (as opposed to the previous 3 mins).

All in all, an intriguing year ahead for comics and sci-fi.

Speaking of cartoons, there was a show on Channel 4 on Sunday night about the 100 Greatest Cartoons of all time. No.1 was The Simpsons (duh!), followed by Tom and Jerry (my dad’s fav cartoon for some reason) and South Park. Watching the show was like reliving bits of my childhood – Thundercats, He-Man, Transformers, The Little Mermaid, Fantasia etc. all brought back memories of a rather more innocent age. There were also cartoons like Samurai Jack, a current favourite of mine, and I never quite realised how big Rugrats was. But who cares eh?

The Oscars was an entertaining watch as well. Was very pleased to see Morgan Freeman finally get the recognition he deserves. Felt like smacking Sharon Osbourne when she continually harped on about how Clive Owen should have won (Closer was a good movie, but he wasn’t exactly best actor material in it). The rather unfair absence of Fahrenheit 9/11 and Passion of the Christ was acknowledge, Chris Rock was an entertaining host who should be rehired next year, loved Robin Williams and was pretty impressed with Halle Berry and Zhang Ziyi. Hahaha… Just got a DVD copy of Million Dollar Baby, so I’ll be able to see if it’s worth the hype. The clips I’ve seen have been rather impressive, and heck, it’s bound to be better than Sideways.

I’ve been asked by a few friends about attending Siti Nurhaliza’s concert at the Royal Albert. Arguments for attending included the fact that ‘it’s at the Royal Albert tau?!’ (so?), ‘kita kenalah support artis tempatan’ (by paying lots so that they can cover the cost of a single night’s performance at an undeniably expensive venue?), ‘kau tak bangga ke?’ (tak) and so on and so forth.

But please lah… I do not doubt her talent or her brother's genius in business, but the ticket prizes are exorbitant. I’ll probably speak differently if I was a fan, so I’m admittedly biased. It’ll be interesting to see how many mat sallehs actually attend the concert (besides the spouses/partners of Malaysians, dignitaries and VIPs that is). Among the Malaysians, I guess some fans will go (the richer ones have the option of paying 80-125 pounds for a ticket), some will see it as a nice social outing, and some will pay the price in the hope that the networking that will be going on will bring its own rewards. If I balked at paying 50 quid to watch the legendary Eric Clapton at the Royal Albert, I doubt I’ll give Siti any serious consideration. Baik beli kasut.